Did you ever think you’d be living through a plague? That’s the question I’ve been asking all my patients lately. It may sound basic but there’s a method to my madness. Not only does the question acknowledge our shared experience of weirdness, it also puts Covid-19 into perspective. “Pandemic” sounds a bit too clinical but “plague” provides the proper impact. Plague feels more like a blow to the head which kind of sums up where we are. That may sound silly, like I’m parsing words when we all know what’s going on, but it’s important for us to understand where …
There’s Still So Much to Love about Sex Education
NOTE: There are definitely spoilers ahead. You have been warned. Getting the flu really sucks. What with all the coughing, sneezing, body aches and chills, you really can’t do much while you’re recovering. It’s almost as if my body was insisting that I stay in and binge watch the second season of Sex Education on Netflix. Challenge accepted! I absolutely adored the first season of the show. It was funny, educational and charming. I expected nothing less from the second outing. However, while the season was still great, I should’ve remembered the sophomore slump. New shows often have trouble finding …
Why Won’t I Leave My Husband?
Question: I’m married and have two sons. Even from the beginning, my marriage wasn’t great. My husband constantly cheats on me, even when I was pregnant! Whenever I confront him, he promises not to do it again but he does. It’s like he can’t stop himself. If it was just the affairs, I could deal with it but we also fight all the time. This has made me depressed and anxious. It’s gotten so bad that I’ve even been hospitalized. I know my marriage isn’t worth fighting for (even my oldest son begged me to leave) but I can’t. I …
My Mom’s an Alcoholic
Question: My mom drinks alcohol a lot. When she’s drunk, she acts stupid, like being silly or having accidents in the car. Sometimes we get into fights because I’m so mad at her for not acting normal or being like other moms. When we fight, I hurt her but I don’t let her hurt me. My dad gets really mad at her too. He calls her an alcoholic and says they’re getting divorced. Both of them talk badly about the other. I don’t know what to do. Answer: You’re dealing with two of the most difficult situations a child can …
Two Names for Grandson Will Be Fine
Question: My daughter recently had a child with a man she barely knows. The two of them don’t get along well and he’s sometimes hostile towards her in front of their son. The father has limited visitation which is good. However, he and his family refuse to call my grandson by his given name. I’m worried that this conflict over my grandson’s name will have a negative impact on him. We don’t want him to be confused. Answer: It’s very disappointing when co-parents cannot get along with each other because it is in the best interests of the child(ren) that …
The Pain Beneath the Bobbitt Case
John Wayne and Lorena Bobbitt made a huge splash back in the 1990s when she cut off his penis. While I remember the case being constantly in the news, I was fairly uninterested in it. I was too busy starting my career and my marriage to waste a lot of time watching television or reading about entertainment news. So I’ll admit that my memory of the case is faulty. However, after watching the docuseries Lorena about the whole thing, I wonder just how much my understanding of the case was formed by what I didn’t see. What stands out in …
‘Wild’ Thoughts on a Feminist Work
I’m a huge Reese Witherspoon fan. While I haven’t seen every movie she’s made, I do keep an eye on her work. That’s why when I got the chance to see Wild, the movie about Cheryl Strayed’s three-month long hike across the Pacific Crest Trail (PCT), I took it. And I wasn’t sorry. In fact, I liked the movie so much that I read the book too. I’m not an outdoorsy kind of person but that story made me want to be. Although Strayed never minimized the difficulties of her journey – she often mentioned the pain, fatigue, hunger, loneliness …
Is This Gaslighting?
Question: My ex-boyfriend used to constantly accuse me of cheating on him even though he was the one who was being unfaithful. He even called me a whore and told all his friends that I was one. Even though I never cheated, he demanded that I “come clean” and said he couldn’t be with someone who lied. I used to feel like I was crazy because I knew I wasn’t lying yet he insisted I was. Now that we’ve broken up, things are better for me but I can’t get rid of the bad feelings. Is his behavior gaslighting? Answer: …
Healthcare, Illness & Love: Oh My!
Not a lot of movies impress me these days. Hollywood seems way more interested in special effects, remakes, superheroes and horror than relationships and character growth. So I don’t watch too many movies, especially not ones with stupid titles. But one day I was on a plane and bored when I begrudgingly watched the movie Love & Other Drugs. I was blown away. It’s kind of a weird movie. At first it seems like a typical romantic drama where two dysfunctional people (Maggie and Jamie) figure out how to be in a relationship. Although it starts out like that, mid-way …
My Son Admires the Columbine Killers
Question: Help! My son says he admires the Columbine shooters because they felt the same way he does toward society. I’ve read that a lot of young men feel this way which is pretty scary. I’m worried for my son but I don’t know what to say. How can I explain that what they did is wrong? Answer: One of the many problems with what happened in Littleton, Colorado on April 20, 1999 is the amazing amount of misinformation about what exactly occurred. Columbine, one of the best books covering the tragedy, was written by Dave Cullen, a journalist who …